99poems/joy

Joy eludes me:
the thought that
wakes me at
5 a.m.
I think of writing
letters to friends,
and wonder
what would it
take to lift me
from the weight
of my life,
where nothing
is wrong except
the annoyances
of daily living,
the unsettled details
and my gift for
fixating upon them.
The heaviness
of 4 p.m.,
when the day
has lost its
hope,
the sense of
walking through
cobwebs in a room
where boxes are
always falling
off shelves,
onto me.

5/25/99