She said
my aura
was crystal,
that people
hated me
when they
hated themselves.
She said
I came as
a volunteer,
I wish
I hadn’t.
My great-great-
grandfather
volunteered
for the War of 1812,
and walked from
Tennessee to New Orleans
to get there.
The Tennessee Volunteers.
It’s in my genes.
And more than
that.
She said
I didn’t have
to do it
any more,
that I was
free now
to live my
life for myself,
but she didn’t
tell me
how to know
how to.

1/16/02